Satya

Someone I was fairly close to mentioned to me a while back that they often felt that I was never quite honest with them. They said to me that it was okay to be angry with them, and they could always tell when I was holding back a part of the truth (how they could tell I was never told). I told them that I wasn't being dishonest, but that I was just careful about how I worded things and that I tried really hard to always say exactly what I meant (and only what I meant). My pauses to think were not me holding back, but just me contemplating the best way to relay my thoughts to them.

Today I was reading a trashy teenage romance novel, and for the first time ever in my life I read something in the awkward, angsty teen romance that was actually really valuable. The main character brought up a yoga term called Satya, which roughly means "truthfulness in kindness." I wish I had heard about this idea a long time ago so I could have used it to more clearly explain my lengthy reflections to this person.

This web site states that Satya requires one to speak the truth, but also reminds us "to consider what we say, how we say it, and in what way it could affect others." I can't explain what I was trying to do in a better way: by not blurting out what I was thinking or feeling immediately, I wasn't lying or holding back the truth... I was simply trying to convey the truth in the sincerest way possible.

Like most people, I hate it when people are not honest with me. I have found that knowing the truth is always better than being fed a lie or being kept in the dark, even when the truth hurts. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people say they are going to do something or tell me something simply because they think it is what I want to hear, and then I find out later that they weren't being honest with me.

This web site adds to the concept of Satya by saying:

In this modern age, it is commonly accepted for people to commit to various things and to have no intention of keeping their word, the feeling being it is more important to tell someone what they think they want to hear rather than simply telling the truth.

[...]

While telling the truth it is important to speak in a positive way so as not to cause hurt, yet at the same time be as straightforward and sincere as possible. To many people it might seem impractical or too difficult to always be truthful, but if practiced over time it becomes easier and many stumbling blocks along the path are removed.

At this point in time, I feel truer words have never been spoken.

I think I just might like yoga. Who saw that one coming?